BiJeff's Blog - page 2

Another picture, with me shaved this time, because I know he likes seeing my face smooth... It's so much fun, having someone whose heart beats at the same rhythm, in my life...

How do you like my Captain of the Enterprise chair? It's pretty unique, at work, and my co-workers think I'm nuts. That okay, because it's true!

Fins all flared, means they like each other!

It's difficult to get a good picture of them, but here is one that didn't turn out too badly. The big dark blue one is the one I inherited, Blue Princess I call her. The rusty colored one is the male, swimming in his own bowl. He gets really energetic when I let him swim around with the Blue Princess. And the other small striped one, is the girl. Her colors change all the time, to almost as dark blue as the Blue Princess, to a little lighter than she is now, almost see-thru, except for the stripes.

I had a coworker take this picture of me, to send to my new admirer I mentioned in the blog entry below, and thought that some of the rest of you, might like seeing it too. Yes, I have some fish, 3 betta's, and some plants growing in their aquarium, too. It all got started last summer, when another coworker was unfortunately fired. He left his one betta behind, while being escorted out of the building, and I've been taking care of it since, getting it a girl friend, and a boy friend. I've never had fish before, and now I'm a little out of control with the whole thing, but I'm having fun, and the coworkers like seeing my little Sea-World going on...

Someone shy here on NN contacted me in the beginning of February. His profile is totally empty, just the kind that you don't like to find, when someone sends you a pm...

However, I have a tendency to respond to those pm's too, although it's a bit more difficult, as you don't know much about them, so starting a decent conversation is virtually impossible. But I seem to usually find something to say, anyway...

So I responded, and then he contacted me back. He said enough of the right things, that I responded back again. We started exchanging pm's here on NN regularly, and he sent me a few fuzzy small pics. But I could see in the pics, that everything was there I liked, and nothing that I didn't... Then he took off, for business in another city, and has been there ever since, and will continue to be for a while. We've since moved our conversation to yahoo, because NN's pm system is rather antiquated, and have been developing a real open and honest friendship.

We still haven't met, and yet I'm very excited, and it's a nice feeling! I haven't had the sort of feedback, that whats-his-name is currently giving me, in years, and it's so good to hear.

I think that a significant event may be in my future, and I'm very excited about it. And just had to share this info with you all!

I never expected something like this, when I joined up NN. I signed up, because I love being part of the scenery here at NN. I have acquired some really nice friends, from all over the planet. People that I most likely will never have the pleasure of being to eat a meal with, sit on the beach with, or just sit on the living room sofa together, and enjoy a quiet afternoon in front of the television, watching a movie. I would really like to, with many of you here, but let's keep a little bit of reality in play here.

Did I mention, that I'm feeling a little extra happy these days? I know that I'm walking a little more tall these days, and a constant extra edge to my smile. A couple of my friends and coworkers have noticed, even though I haven't said anything. I've been wanting to keep my trap shut, until I get to actually meet this guy, and have lunch with him, but I'm getting a little too excited, to be able to do that!

'Nuff said, for now... Tune in later, for another chapter, hopefully one of many more happy ones to come...

Life is returning to normal. Thank Goodness.

Back about 4 years ago, when I owned my grocery store, I met this guy, like so many other customers there, and got to know him a little bit. He and I have kept in contact, and when he and his girlfriend were splitting up last October, he asked if he could stay at my place a short while. I agreed. I didn't realize that he was a hardcore alcoholic, drinking a fifth of cheap 100proof vodka everyday. I couldn't stand him being here. 90% of the time, he was blacked-out, and didn't remember crap from moment to moment, let alone the next day or next week. I don't know where he got the money to keep himself in cigarettes and vodka; he didn't work but maybe 4 hours every 3 weeks or so. What a nightmare!

I told him in the middle of January that he needed to move out. 2 weeks later I brought it up again, and of course he didn't remember. I started to get mean about it, telling him that I was tired of him taking a free ride, at my expense, both financially and emotionally, and friendship-wise also. The next week comes, and he thinks he still has 3 weeks left. OMG! Anyway, he's finally gone, except that a bunch of his stuff is still here. I need to tell him that his stuff is going to be out of here come March 1, one way or another!

Other than that, life is okay. My job is secure to at least October. That is good news; I've been dirt poor before, not knowing how I'm going to make my next month's mortgage payment, for months at a time, and that is NO fun at all. I can't believe that bank execs are getting bonuses while people are being foreclosed out of their home, but that's another tirade entirely.

Love life is still in idle. I have 3 ex's. First one is Traci, a woman I knew since we were both in 8th grade, or about 13 years old. She moved away from Germany, and to Nebraska, at the end of our senior year (18 years old). Yes, we were both Air Force brats. Anyway, the love really bloomed at that point, and I flew to Nebraska right after turning 19, and spent 2 weeks with her and her family. Those 2 weeks definitely ended my hetero virginity. I flew back to Oregon, where we'd moved to about 8 months earlier. We kept a pretty intense relationship going via the mail, for about another 8 months. She decided to move up to Oregon, but when she found out how much it would cost, (no Air Force footing the bill this time!), well, things starting cooling off. We were going to have 3 kids. OMG. In hindsight, I'm glad that didn't happen, although at the time I wasn't at all happy about it. I don't remember today why moving myself down to Nebraska wasn't an option. Hummm... I sure would like to hear from her, to catch up on how the pinball game called life has treated her.

Enough for now... Chatty Kathy is going back in her closet, to re-emerge after another random interval of time...

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Dreaming.

I hardly ever dream, maybe 8 times a year. I normally sleep like a rock. I set the alarm, go to bed, and seconds later it's time to get up, it seems. Sometimes I'm refreshed, sometimes not. Anyway, I digress.

My dreams seem to run in long series. My last 6 or so dreams have all centered around the same thing. Being able to become weightless, and just go through the air, and land where I want. Not flapping my arms, or anything, just standing up. It starts with me focusing on becoming weightless. I can then literally feel the weightless effect overcoming me, from my head to my toes. It's really strong in my stomach and my head. Kind of like in an airplane, while taking off. Then I focus on gaining some altitude. I've only gotten maybe 30 feet off the ground, but that's plenty enough for going right over houses and traffic!

And in the more recent dreams, I'm getting more skilled at initiating the weightlessness and moving around. It takes less focus effort and time to get going. And I can go faster, with more confidence.

I think this is so bizarre, having these dreams, running in a sequence, even though it's weeks and weeks between episodes... And to build on a dream-acquired skill; just too bizarre!! LOL


For about a year before the flying dreams started, I was swimming underwater, being able to breath the water just fine. There were about a dozen of these in a row. Kind of like the flying series, but no adjustment period; being underwater seemed very natural, like I'd been underwater all my life. It was almost like I was a dolphin, in a human body.

So strange.

I can be a real chatter box, as some of you have found out, if the mood strikes me. I've wanted to start a blog for a long time, but haven't ever really had the nerve to start one. Funny how I can be comfortable showing things the sun has never seen, but shy about writing something down here...

I tend to do things in streaks. As in, spend a lot of time on NN, and then drop down to maybe 2 hours a month, and then back to 2 hours every day! Work goes the same way for me, sometimes just getting 40 hours in, most weeks 55 hours, and sometimes more. But I really like what I do. It's like being paid overtime to do my hobby!

So what finally inspired me to start this, you wonder? I looked at my profile, and saw that I'm up to 8990 views. I'm blown away, by how many people found something curious enough to have a further look. In sales lingo, that's having 8990 people in the funnel - what a crowd!! Today I have 121 friends, an all time record for me. That blows me away, too. I've lost some in the past, either they quit NN, or dumped me??? I'm not sure why; I've never asked, too shy for that!

I remember one day, I was looking at my comment manager, and checked out the latest comment someone had left. When I refreshed the screen a couple of minutes later, there was another comment from the same guy. I clicked on it, and and read it, along with all the other comments on that pic (like I always do, read all the comments all over again). Again when I went back, and refreshed the Comment Manager screen, there was another comment. This went on for about half an hour, me basically reading comments that were being left on my pics, virtually real-time. That was very stimulating!!!!!!

A thanks to everybody who's been writing me comments and pm's! It certainly adds to the fun that this exhibitionist/voyeur has here!!!!

During the next indeterminably long period till my next blahg entry, have fun!!!